Married with children (OK just 1 child...on the way...)

So no new pictures for now...just some thoughts I wanted to make sure I recorded while this baby girl is still INSIDE me and not demanding my every waking moment's attention :)

First things first: some pregnancy updates. I'm now 30 weeks along and feeling more and more awkward with my belly weight. Getting up from a sitting position is almost comical and getting up from the floor requires me to go to all fours and then swing myself up. I can't bend over without bending my knees (luckily Peter is patient with me when it takes multiple attempts to get down and click his leash on his collar!) and I can only see my feet when I move to the side or lean my head forward. And my belly button is no longer an "inny" but rather nonexistent.

The past couple weeks were really hard because I had severe heartburn that was causing vomiting...I actually lost a little weight which didn't make me happy knowing that I need to be putting on the most weight during this third trimester, I had to sleep sitting straight up and then only got a few hours of sleep, interrupted by mad dashes to the bathroom. Luckily, my doctor's office suggested what I now know to be a MIRACLE drug--Zantac. For the first time in weeks my heartburn was under control and I felt like a new person after finally getting some sleep.

Little Victoria Rose is SUPER active at night right before bedtime and periodically throughout the day. Her latest favorite spot is the right side of my rib cage. I guess she got bored from her boxing matches with my bladder and decided to go for a bigger challenge that didn't give in so easily. She'll stick her foot up in my rib and just leave it pushing there for what seems like FOREVER. I can even push from the outside and feel her foot there in the way. I keep trying to videotape her movements so I can send them to Dave but they're really hard to get clearly on tape :(

In other news, Dave and I have had some wonderful discussions about relationships in general and our relationship in particular...I've always believed that a healthy relationship requires frequent "check-ins" where you cant talk openly about where you think you are as a couple, if your expectations are being met, need to be changed, etc... and with the computer screen being the lifeline connecting us, we've had some really wonderful opportunities to improve our communication and work to keep close to each other regardless of our locations or the different ways we are spending our days. So I'd thought I'd share some of our learning moments.

* As the old addages teach us, marriage takes work. While love can be an incredibly motivating force to help people stay connected to each other, we think that many divorces occur simply because one party or the other quits working to demonstrate and deepen that love. Or, the ways that they demonstrate their love aren't the ways the other partner understands love or aren't the ways the other partner expects to be loved. It's really sad to think that people originally drawn to each other by sincere love end up hating each other because they didn't work to communicate enough during their marriage.

* Similarly, marriage requires humility and a WILLINGNESS to work. Even if you don't end up actually working on things as much as you'd like, as long as you are WILLING to reach out to your partner and be humble about your shortcomings, there is always room for forgiveness and reconciliation. No union can survive if a partner has "checked out" and refuses to try to work anymore.

* Marriage is a sacred institution in part because of the opportunity it provides for parenthood. I really believe that parenthood is a calling even though the possibility is biologically granted to everyone. I can't understate how much I've learned to appreciate the complementarity of man and woman over the past few months as the things that I prioritize in preparation for parenthood aren't always the same things Dave does. And they come together only as perfectly as the two parents choose to work together and use their individual strengths to make up for each other's weaknesses. I am so immensely grateful to know that our children will be born under the covenants Dave and I made with God in His temple and will come home to both a mommy and a daddy who love them. Of course there are single parents, grandparents, extended family, adopted parents etc that do fabulous jobs raising their families and righteously as well. I just more fully understand the IDEAL of a two parent household more than I did before getting married.

* Finally, we just keep learning more and more about how much we truly love each other. Knowing that we are thinking about each other and supporting each other every day helps us stay positive and really use this time apart to grow together rather than just work to make the time pass. We share our daily experiences so we keep up-to-date and continually feel like we are a part of each other's activities. We play games together over the internet to pass some down time together and it's really beautiful to see that we can talk to each other for over an hour every day and never grow bored of our conversations or find ourselves searching for things to say. I still really miss being able to physically communicate (some of the things I miss most are feeling him roll over in his sleep next to me, holding his hand when we'd say prayers, having his hand on my knee while he would drive, and when I would give him a HIJAH--basically a bear hug to knock him over and pin him down on the bed where I could tickle him) but I am learning how powerful and meaningful other modes of communication can be. From using inside jokes and songs in our email exchanges to finding websites we want to share with each other to news stories we discuss together, we work hard to spend quality time together and end up always looking forward to the next time we get to talk.

So, basically, life is good. I don't have any really exciting trips or projects to report. And I don't mind. I'd prefer our uneventful backgammon games a million times over to a short-lived luxury vacation or grandiose purchase. The daily routine of taking care of Peter and trying to keep myself fed and the house clean continues to take the majority of my energy. And what's left over I use to tell Dave about my daily routine.